Admittedly, as an acupuncturist, I’m just as “bad” as Dr. Oz when it comes to talking about poop.  As healthcare practitioners, it is par for the course, and moreover, it’s essential to learn about your bowels so that we can see what kind of state your body is in.  So get the squirminess out of the way, cause I’m going to give you the real poop on poop.

First, take my “Poop Quiz”:

1) The consistency of my poop is:

A) hard

B) softer

C) well-formed (neither hard nor soft, no real residue left when wiping)

D) mainly diarrhea

2) The smell of my poop is:

A) terrible, like death

B) I can’t smell much

C) roses

3) I poop:

A) once a day

B) once every 2-3 days

C) once every 4-5 days

D) 2-3 times a day

E) more than 3 times a day

4) The color of my poop is:

A) light brown to yellow-ish

B) medium brown

C) dark brown

D) green

E) red or black

Now that you have your answers, let’s talk about what is normal, what is not, and how to get to normal if you’re not there.  While sources may say that a wide range of bowel symptoms are normal, such as going multiple times a day to out to once every 3 days…that’s not really reflective of the ideal scenario.  So what is the ideal scenario? You should be having a bowel movement after every meal, so 3 times a day.  It should be well-formed, and not cause a mess when you’re wiping.  There shouldn’t be much smell at all.  It should be medium brown in color, or green if you eat a lot of greens/roughage.

Wow, that’s definitely not me, you might be saying.  Most of us, myself included, are not ideal poopers.  Let’s talk about the different categories of non-normal: constipation, soft stools, and more serious problems.

Constipation

If you are someone who has 1-2 bowel movements a day then I am not concerned.  If you’re going every other day or even less frequently, then there is room for improvement, and you are technically constipated.  So what?  Well, when the bowels move too slowly through the GI tract, then there is more time for toxins to be leached into your bloodstream…and none of us want that!  Not to mention all the discomfort that can come from constipation, due to hardened stools.  In its most extreme form, stools can become hard like clay and difficult to pass, tearing the bowels and creating hemorrhoids as well.  When the bowels are torn then again more toxins are leaked directly into the bloodstream and can poison you.  That’s never a good thing.  Constipated bowels are usually darker brown and can even look like little pellets or like pellets smashed together in the severe form.

Soft Stools

 If you spend a lot of time wiping, and your stools look a little softer and on the lighter brown to more yellowish color scale, chances are you have softer bowels.  Soft stools are kind of like a minor version of diarrhea (or that stuff in between, yuck!).  Soft stools are most often related to diet, but we’ll talk more about that in a bit.

Bowel Issues

Everything including Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) or Disease (IBD), chronic diarrhea, Crohn’s Disease, Colitis, black or tarry stools, and blood in the stools is a bowel issue (at least partly).  While this blog is too short to get into every single condition, if you have black or red stools, or you have diarrhea consistently, you should seek medical attention.  If you have black or tarry stools, seek medical attention immediately.  This can be an indication of a life threatening condition.

How to get to the perfect poop

The good news is, in most cases, you can treat your bowel issues with dietary modifications and exercise.  In Chinese Medicine, if your stools are soft or loose, then it is due to a weakened spleen.  If they are harder and you are constipated, then it is due to stagnation in the liver.  Both of these things are addressed via The 21 Day Chinese Medicine Cleanse.  I recommend the foods that will build up your spleen and get that liver moving.

Does this all sound crazy?  Well, let’s put it in easier terms.  There are certain foods that bring balance to your entire system (not just your bowels).  When you introduce something that is naturally inflammatory to your system, like wheat or dairy, then your whole system gets affected.  In this case, your bowels go nuts and next thing you know, you’re spewing like a geyser.  When you don’t exercise, drink enough water, or eat enough veggies, then you’re blocked up and you’re in for a future of cramps, gas, and not fun times on the toilet.

Here are some quick tips to get those bowels in better shape:

1) Get moving!  Go on 5-10 min walks at least 3 times a day, or one longer walk.  Take the stairs instead of the elevator.  Park your car farther away when you go to the store.  These things add up and get those bowels regulated!

2) Drink half your body weight in ounces of water a day.  If you weigh 150, that means you will need to drink 75 oz, which is a little over 2 liters a day.  Get a pretty water bottle (or an attractive dude like one for you guys) to help motivate you.  Water works wonders for the bowels.

3) Drop any psychological reasons you have for not pooping.  I’m a girl, I get it, we “never” poop.  I was trained that way, and many of us were.  What do I have to show for it?  A diverticula in my colon, internal hemrrhoids, and previously IBS…this was all at the age of 30 or so.  These are old people issues.  Don’t hold it in people.  It is not a good path.  Sorry to get graphic and a little too personal with you there, but I’m passionate about this point since I have suffered and no one else needs to.  When you’ve gotta go, then go.  Find that private one stall toilet, or do what you’ve gotta do…

4) Limit your intake of wheat, dairy, alcohol, and sugar.  Of course The 21 Day Chinese Medicine Cleanse is a great way to do this in a supported manner, but even just limiting it on your own can be massively helpful.

I can say that after overhauling my diet a couple years ago and having support with acupuncture that my days of GI issues are all but behind me.  I know what my triggers are, and if I consume them, then I know I am in for some not so fun times.  Being empowered and feeling good is totally worth it.  Join me!